What are we taking about here?
Stress and anxiety are words we may use interchangeably. And for good reason, as both affect our bodies in similar physiological ways. But look up the commonly held definitions of these words and we find that while anxiety is a persistent feeling arising from our own condition, stress is triggered by an external event. I personally don’t find that distinction helpful. Ultimately, whether the trigger is internal or external, there is still a layer of processing that goes on in our mind that flips us into that all too familiar high-alert state. Further, trauma-related stress can also mean flashbacks, nightmares and panic attacks.
So, for the purposes of this article, I will use the word stress to also refer to anxiety. Stress is one of a number of borrow-words from mechanics and used in a mental health context (e.g. trauma, tension, depression) and in its original meaning, the suggestion is that we are like a material that has been bent or stretched a material to the point where it’s weakened or cracked.
What does stress do to us?
Physiologically, stress means that the body has released cortisol – a powerful hormone that increases blood glucose to give us energy to attack or run (fight or flight). Its evolutionary purpose is obvious. It helped us survive when under threat. The stressed body also releases adrenaline to increase heart rate and clear airways, and noradrenaline to constrict blood vessels. These hormones also divert energy away from the digestive system and towards the heart and muscles. Another side effect is that the increased cortisol prohibits melatonin production and consequently we find it hard to sleep. This is the physical side of stress: high alert, can’t sleep, can’t eat.
A persistence of cortisol is harmful to our bodies. It is connected with all kinds of issues from weight gain and fatigue to heart disease and diabetes. But, not being a medical professional, I will leave it at that.
Is there anything we can do about stress?
Yes, there is. Usually. At the most basic level, we should get ourselves away from whatever situation is triggering the stress. However many of us find ourselves in situations where that’s easier said than done. Family and work situations can’t be let go of quite so easily. So what else can we do?
First, we can try and introduce activities which are known to reduce stress into our lives. Exercise is often recommended, as is mindfulness, yoga, or indeed doing whatever feels soothing for us. I don’t recommend self-medicating with alcohol or other substances. Nor do I recommend any other diversionary activities with their own harmful consequences such as gambling or self-harming. On the other hand, physical touch from someone you can trust can be soothing, for example massage or dancing. There are plenty of resources online, from sources such as the NHS, MIND and Mental Health UK. Needless to say, if the stress becomes unmanageable, do see a GP as the solution might be that you take anti-anxiety medication.
Second, talk to someone. Being a therapist, I am bound to say that. But it doesn’t have to be a therapist. If the other person is accepting of you then you can start to let go of your worries and feel more emotionally regulated. Sometimes it’s enough just to be in someone’s presence while they do their stuff and you do ours.
These approaches all have one thing in common. That is, to activate the parasympathetic nervous system, sometimes referred to as “rest and digest” (as opposed to “fight or flight”, which is the sympathetic nervous system). At this point I will mention that both these systems can be activated at once, and we end up in a place called “freeze”. I talk more about that here.
If I did speak to a therapist?
There are many therapeutic approaches and some work better for some people than other. The way I work, we would look at the source of threat that is leading to the stress. If it’s an existential threat, such as living in a dangerous neighbourhood, then there is little a therapist can do other than to explore how you might get out of that situation and what’s preventing you. But most stress arises through feelings we are trying to avoid. Such as feeling we’re not good enough (shame) or feeling rejected (sadness, hurt and shame also). Therapy will help uncover those feelings and although they may never go away, they won’t have the same degree of control over you, leaving you with more agency in life.
Adrian Tupper
adriantupper.co.uk
Therapist and supervisor practising at Space for Therapy and Eyre Place Osteopathic Practice.